FILM REVIEW: "Prime Evil"

PRIME EVIL (1988)

*

Directed by Roberta Finlay

Written by Ed Kelleher and Harriette Vidal

Cast:

William Beckwith ("Thomas Seaton"), Christine Moore ("Alexandra Parkman"), and Mavis Harris ("Sister Angela").

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

The film starts off in the Middle Ages, revealing the rise of a secret Satanic cult amongst Europe’s Catholic monks. Fueled by cynicism towards Christianity and a devout belief in the power of Satan, the cult manages to survive until modern times by giving its members eternal youth and beauty via gruesome sacrifices of the cult member’s blood relations.

A devout young nun who’s had some bad run-ins with Satan and his cult manages to infiltrate the group. Meanwhile, another young woman is being selected for sacrifice by her own grandfather, who’s a prominent member of the cult...

WHAT WORKS

Not much, unfortunately. William Beckwith does a decent job as the menacing priest who’s the head of the cult, but the rest of the acting is sub-par.

Some of the gore effects near the end are good, but not all of them, and by that point, it’s too little, too late.

WHAT DOESN’T WORK

Quite a lot. The storyline, in addition to being dull, is comprised of the worse cliches of the “Satanic Panic” of the 80’s, played with such dull earnestness that the film falls flat on its metaphorical face.

For those who haven’t lived through or researched the phenomenon, Prime Evil is like a ‘Greatest Hits’ collection of cult-lore cliches: a powerful Satanic cult that is comprised of Catholic nuns and priests and has survived since ancient times... said cult kidnapping random innocent people and bending them to the High Priest’s evil will via hypnosis and Satanic hoodoo... said cult sacrificing people for nefarious means and finally summoning Satan himself. All the film needed was some children being abused and then its cliche checklist would have been complete.

The various storylines are handled in an inelegant and amateurish fashion. The storyline of the nun infiltrating the group hardly seems necessary to the film, as much of the film focuses on the plight of the granddaughter of one of the most powerful Satanists. The nun just pops up in the story in a handful of scenes, looking quizzical with one eyebrow permanently raised. This gives the film a disjointed quality reminscent of another bad horror film--Pod People, AKA Los Neuvos Extra-terrestrials. That’s right, the infamous sci-fi/horror film that featured “Trumpy” and was parodied on Mystery Science Theater 3000. While watching Prime Evil, I kept thinking of Joel and the bots saying “Meanwhile, in yet another movie...”

The characters are so unmemorable that I started assigning them nicknames based on their most prominent characteristics: “Horny Friend”; “Fashion Victim”; “Dead-Head Junkie”; “Dumpy Killer”; etc. It was rather fun, but it didn’t make for good characters, or good portrayals of said characters. Unfortunately, it’s about the only entertainment value this film has.

Finally, last but not least, the big puppet that serves as this film’s ‘Satan’ is quite ludicrous. Legend did its demonic villain far, far better; using an actual actor. Prime Evil’s Satan pops up in the opening credits, just so we know in advance that the heroes will end up offing a crappy latex puppet.

THE FINAL WORD

If you’re expecting thrills and chills, look elsewhere. Prime Evil is too goofy to be frightening and too far-fetched to be taken seriously.

If you’re looking for cool demon effects (as I was), look elsewhere. There’s plenty of other horror films that have way better gore and creature effects; the special effects ‘talent’ in this film was almost non-existent.

Find "Prime Evil" on IMDB.